A HYPERNATIONALISTIC INDIAN – Part 1

As I was zapping through the channels on my TV set the other day, I came across a weird piece of ‘news’ on a channel called Ind**TV. A very dramatic and excited voice narrated the following:

“Why?Exactly why do you think these two batsman Herschelle Gibbs and J P Duminy are playing well? People I plead you to think what might be the reason.Notice these two photos closely. I think you can tell why they are playing so well. Yes, my viewers its exactly what you think. They play so well because they are both… because they are both …….. bald.”

Wow! Could never have figured that out myself. Then that guy who calls himself a journalist went on to tell about what ingredients might have been mixed in the ‘prasad’ given by Priety Zinta to the Kings XI and what might be the reason why Kevin Peterson was the only person from the opponents side to have eaten that prasad. That person went onto narrate various theories regarding it. I don’t know about news but when it comes to expanding your imagination and widening your thought process about the weirdest possibilities this channel surely helps.

Among the other stuff broadcast by this channel are :
1.When is the world coming to an end?
2.Who is the left-handed magician that is bringing the world to his feet?(Answer: Barrack Obama)
3.Who brought the left-handed magician to his feet?(Answer: His helicopter when the US Prez got struck with the door of the helicopter)
4.Why is ******** Baba not leaving his house anymore?
and lots more…

From where does this channel get such audacity to show all this on national tv for hours and hours together? (Nowadays everyone is getting more and more daring. For instance, the question setters of maths in CBSE XII exam. I still now can’t digest the fact that these guys asked us the HCF of two numbers directly. It felt like a slap on my face. Questioning a class XII student about class III stuff.)The crew at that channel are doing the obvious. Going by the fact that most of India is superstitious, ill-educated (still) and cannot take too much substance at one time, they are broadcasting such weird ideas. What they need is TRP so they target religion in India. Well who does not? From the politicians to the conservative parents everyone has religion that they can use as a weapon. That is somehow a really big weakness in our integrity. We attach so much passion with it that we forget how some people are taking advantage of it.(We here does not imply me or you its for the general people. I don’t have that much a connection with religion. My friends obviously had other divine purposes why they visit temples regularly: to praise the ‘divine’ beauty.)

Everything needs to be dramatized in the Indian media to sell.(Well this is an accepted fact in India. Thats why Om Shanti Om,Heyy Baby,Singh is King got better box office results than Aamir,Mumbai Meri Jaan,Firaaq and even Slumdog Millionaire). Somehow the general public in India does not want substance. We would prefer a hero that beats up gangs of gangsters alone(Ghajini) rather than a realistic hero who dies due to a bomb attack. We must somehow ensure that no one takes advantage of the way we are.Thats not definitely what these news guys must be thinking. Everytime I zap through this channel I am reminded of a ill-directed theatrical performance. Why can’t they just tell the news after all there are other channels on air that serve the purpose they are trying to?( Sometimes you can catch repeat telecasts of your favourite soaps right here in news channels.) I would prefer to watch a regional news channel than this national channel;at least I would get news.Barring a couple of channels that are still virgin to all these tactics and still give pure news ,all the others in some proportion or the other sell dramatised news. Guess its only when we change will these news channels change.

We have tried the iPod and the iPhone , for once lets try this new gadget: iChange.